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About Deviant Member AudessyFemale/United States Recent Activity
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  • Mood: Wow!
  • Listening to: Bad Boy- Cascada
  • Watching: Amnesia
  • Drinking: Vitaminwater
If I'm not an artist than what the hell am I? I have been struggling with this for so long.

I love art, all of it. My interests are not restricted because I'm fascinated by medium, craft, and skill. I love art. I love it to the point I find myself having to do something myself but when my pen hits the paper I am over-ridden with such anxiety and doubt. I have had so many supportive friends, a fiance, family, and I can even see what I'm good at, so why then? Why do I personally feel like my work is never good enough, not worth it, could be better, etc. Honestly I have read enough blogs, magazines, books, and even talked to professionals to figure out how to proceed in my own work. I literally feel a lump in my throat every time I want to make something artistic, fun, exciting, mine, and I just can't. I know I'm not the only person who feels this way and I understand that. I know even the best artist can feel like the art they make isn't worth it despite the contrary belief. Bottom line is I don't want to feel this way about my art. It's mine and will always be mine for better or worse.

I just want to take my anxiety, beat the hell out of it, and tell it to leave me the fuck alone!
Umecko Kuni Witchunter Colored by Audessy
Umecko Kuni Witchunter Colored
Ask me if I'm completely happy how this picture turned out and I'll tell you "Not...really"

But I will say that I have learned a great deal going through the process of this picture. That part I am pleased with. Fixing up the places that had really bad mistakes until they became something I didn't shirk from, pleased. First night picture, pleased. Using my copics and prisma markers, oh yeah definitely pleased. So yeah while I can see what didn't work about this picture, I also feel a sense of pride at the things that did :)
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Tomohisa by Audessy
Tomohisa
This is Tomohisa. She is the granddaughter of a Daimyo of the Phoenix Clan Shiba family. She is an experienced Bushi skilled in Lancing specializing with the Yari, while her brother is an expert Shugenja. Both children are body guards to their grandfather and are considered the best fighters in their city. Although she has a gentle personality, is extremely polite, elegant and graceful, when faced with an enemy in combat she's completely ruthless.  


I made this a year ago, finished most of it a couple months ago, and then touched it up again today. It's been while since I've updated anything and I thought it was time.

Mediums: Colored Pencils, Perm. Markers
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  • Mood: Wow!
  • Listening to: A Song in My Heart- Clannad
  • Watching: Spoony Experiment- Final Fantasy Review
  • Drinking: Cranberry Juice
Lately I've been doing a bunch of things I can think of to better my situation in life, drawing as much art as humanly possible so I can one day start doing commissions, looking for work on the side to have a better life, and other things, but on the side of waiting for things to work themselves out I've been watching movies like Guardians of the Galaxy (Awesome), and catching up with recent animes like Kill la Kill (Also Awesome). So yeah, I've not been trying to avoid coming here again, but the stuff I'm working on is taking a lot of time. Every project I start or are finishing I pick up several new ones to keep me company. That sounds like a lot of work but for the goals I have in mind, and the fact it's how much I have stored in my brain. I'm grateful to have so much going on at once.

I hope everyone is having a great month :)
Umecko, Kuni Witchunter by Audessy
Umecko, Kuni Witchunter
Ok I believe I mentioned before that I have played Legend of the 5 Rings and if I haven't well I am now. I have a love hate relationship with this game, but where there's love so shall there be art of my characters, and since I even helped make a campaign with my boyfriend, and made a huge cast of villains for everyone to fight, they will all be uploaded over time on DA.

This is an original character named is Umecko, she is a Kuni Witch Hunter from the Crab Clan. Yes she has a huge back-story (Has to in order to play the game), but I plan on explaining her back-story in the colored version I'll be uploading on here as soon as I'm done.

Perspective wise and placement of the bridge may cause confusion, but I made sure to work it out as best as possible. She's standing on a portion of a courtyard next to the bridge. Now that's out of the way. The truth is I had no idea I was going to go in so much detail on the background :O_o: No shit! it started out as only maple trees in the BG a few months ago. But since I've been in a finish my old works kind of mood, the environment of the BG took on a life of it's own. If you know L5R you'd know that I made this place look a little too nice. The Crab clan make strong fortresses to constantly battle the forces of evil every single day, so yeah my dainty looking courtyard is a big enough contrast to that. I didn't mean to make it look less intimidating but I still really love how it came out

I also would like to note that I'm a beginner study on Japanese, so if I wrote the kanji wrong please feel free to correct me. I made sure to research it first but I wouldn't be surprised if I effed this up anyway. I can't fix it on paper but I can in PS :)
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Audessy's Profile Picture
Audessy
Audessy
United States
Current Residence: Consumption Town
Favourite genre of music: New Age
Favourite photographer: My Mom
Favourite style of art: Everything
MP3 player of choice: My Black Stone
Skin of choice: My Own
Favourite cartoon character: Calvin & Hobbes, Jubei K., Ran K.
Personal Quote: "Only the truest of dreamers can succeed the Odyssey"
Interests
  • Mood: Wow!
  • Listening to: Bad Boy- Cascada
  • Watching: Amnesia
  • Drinking: Vitaminwater
If I'm not an artist than what the hell am I? I have been struggling with this for so long.

I love art, all of it. My interests are not restricted because I'm fascinated by medium, craft, and skill. I love art. I love it to the point I find myself having to do something myself but when my pen hits the paper I am over-ridden with such anxiety and doubt. I have had so many supportive friends, a fiance, family, and I can even see what I'm good at, so why then? Why do I personally feel like my work is never good enough, not worth it, could be better, etc. Honestly I have read enough blogs, magazines, books, and even talked to professionals to figure out how to proceed in my own work. I literally feel a lump in my throat every time I want to make something artistic, fun, exciting, mine, and I just can't. I know I'm not the only person who feels this way and I understand that. I know even the best artist can feel like the art they make isn't worth it despite the contrary belief. Bottom line is I don't want to feel this way about my art. It's mine and will always be mine for better or worse.

I just want to take my anxiety, beat the hell out of it, and tell it to leave me the fuck alone!

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:iconcarol-colors:
carol-colors Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2014
:thanks: Thank you for the :+fav: (coloring)
Reply
:iconmarakov:
marakov Featured By Owner Aug 19, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for the fave xD
Reply
:iconaudessy:
Audessy Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2014
Of course. I looked at your picture and I was immediately entranced by the colors and the atmosphere you created. It put off a mystical and magical feel to it, the light off the jellyfish enhanced it for me as well as the girl's serene expression :) You do amazing work. Also, thank you for the :+fav: too :heart:
Reply
:iconmarakov:
marakov Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2014  Student Digital Artist
I'm so happy to read this, so happy to pass those feelings 
thank you very much xD
Reply
:iconaudessy:
Audessy Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014
anytime :blowkiss:
Reply
:icondamaimikaz:
DamaiMikaz Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks a lot for adding my work to your collection.
Reply
:iconaudessy:
Audessy Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2014
Of course I would you're freaking awesome :D I love the atmosphere you create for each picture you make, it's great.
Reply
:icongensan613:
gensan613 Featured By Owner May 24, 2013
Thank you for the fav ^^
Reply
:iconev-sta:
Ev-sta Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2012
Thanks a lot for faving my work! i appreciate it :)
Reply
:iconrosedore:
rosedore Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2010
Hello my dear! How are you doing? Haven't heard from you for so long. I hope you're well. I miss you. :hug: :heart:
Reply
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